Redemption

Listening to: R-evolve - 30 seconds to mars

Thursday 28th August.
Noor's Birthday Party.




It was fun. Threw cake around at fuds.
Talked & laughed. Played around the bathroom... Pictures are ♥.


Listening to: Redemption - Gackt ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ (gackt deserves so much hearts)

Friday 29th August.
Adhari with the Yans.



Got there at 4:12 with boo, nada, & mauree. Waited around for the park to open. Hanged out in the food court randomly laughing at every joke they tell us.
It was almost empty. Haha no lines to wait in. We first rode the Octopus thingie.
Me and Boo love that ride. Nada got freaked out!! She was swearing so fucking much!
I went all hyper and dragged Kal to the Himalaya. I got paired with him while nikki gets Robbie
The ride was fun. We rode that 3 times. Haha.
I puked. T-T I went on the swing and I felt like puking after that. I drank coke thinking it might help. But it didn't the moment I got up and walked with nada. I threw up all over the nearest tree. Gez. Well, the staff were all 'are you okay?' and crap.
Hours later Bowling. I was second place, robbie was last. Hahahahaha. Then BUMPER cars!! woohoo that was fun. Me and Boo rode the octopus twice. Got a phone call and Nikki was kinda pissed at me cause of it. I pretty much dont care if she is or not. Ate Kfc. Kal and I had a long conversation bout everything. He constantly wanted to make me smile saying "I don't want to see that frown on your face when you leave" I found it sweet.
Ate mooncakes! Woohoo~ doesn't taste good. I picked the wrong flavor. o=o
I'm going to miss them. I can't go out much on Ramadan.


If you leave and I don't get to see you. I'll cry my eyes out.
Too soon.

~

Anxious...
So fucking anxious.

Jrock & all that jazz

Listening to: Uneasy Hearts weigh the most ~ Dance Gavin Dance

*sigh*

I've found out something really relieving yesterday.
I'll just shut up about that.

I got up at 9:30. Thanks mom. Didn't eat breakfast. Theres no food.
I should wake up earlier. For the food.
Mom woke me up and the first thing she said to me was 'eat more, you look like a skeleton'
Thats a great good morning mom.

Gah... Call this person. Call that person. Damn.
Oh well, I'm watching Emma.
I miss this.
I'm going to paint right after I reply to JJ's huge ass email.


O______O Jamie Oliver is on tv. *drools* Brits are... *drool*

Less than sixteen roses

Mizuki-san no Sadie desu

listening to: Goodbye foolishness(サヨナラの果て） - Sadie


After replying to weldon's comment on FS. I sorta whacked my notebook. stupid thing.
Gah, my hormonal patch is like going crazy these days and its pissing the hell out of me.
Oh well. Big deal.
I'm going to Noor's birthday on Thursday. It better be good cause I'm skipping a Jam to go there.
Kevin seems like he wants to see me real bad or something. Boo is being the normal girl best friend and going the guy likes you. Just make him admit it already. Haha Boo. I don't think so.
Its a freaking miracle Abood hasn't called. Thank you so much. I don't want to deal with that dude. Hes nice and all. But why the hell does he call me and not the other girls too? Weird.

After watching SUICIDAL APPLICANTS DVD. I decided to cut my hair. I blame the boys of sadie. I was staring at their hair. I want their hair. I can easily cut my own hair to make it look like that. Oh man... I really want Jyou's hair. That girls hair is O_O. Shes hot too. wooo~ haha I'm not attracted to her though. Which is a good thing. I don't want the hiko incident to happen again.

Jyou

and.... Hiko. Damn u girl! u could be a guy. Esp. with ur voice. I thought u were a dude.
*hitshead* naj.... stop staring at the pic already. *cough*


ahem...
this is what mon~sUn wants to look like.
(naj wants hiko's boots)

.........

............

right... okie enough dreaming.
Nada had a fever a few days ago. Now, Nasser has one. Soon me. Woo~ I can't wait. o-o
Moms at the clinic with him. *pats moron boy* ahem.
anyways... its so freaking hot.

dies.

-_-

Parents fought for the first time in a very long time.
and it was cause of something really stupid too.

Mom was crying in the car... I had to cool her down a bit.
Dad is being such an asshole. Mom is going to give him the cold shoulder later.
and she wants Nikki out of the house too... . . . . . . . . . . . Ha.ha.ha.
ahem. Well, whatever.

The Fuck?

Sorry Ren. I know I'm not supposed to be swearing. But I don't care right now.


I don't know whats wrong with me. I get pissed at Nada and Nikki so fucking much. Its like I can't stand being around them anymore without losing my temper. The problem now is. I don't know why. Why the hell would I do that.
Okay, I'm angry. I've already let out some of that shit out that night and I also cried. How come I don't feel any different? A lightness of burden or something.... anything? Its still the same and its fucking annoying. One more I swear she does something again. i WILL end our friendship personally. I don't fucking know whats wrong with me. Why the hell would I want that? I don't understand myself. I don't get it. The hell is going on with me lately? Three days I've noticed this happening for 3 days now and I hate it. Someone kill me before I kill everyone including myself.

Split personalities? Fuck that. I've been turning into such a fucking bitch. I hate it so freaking much. That means I'm hating myself too.

Just give it some time? Fine time.

Gah. I'll freaking throw tantrums all over the place if this doesn't end. soon.

Back to Normal

Boo fixed things with me. I put up a little fight. Telling her I needed both my best friends not just one. Especially when Ren is leaving soon. After that who do I have left? She said its better than me being torn between the two of them. I rather be torn between the two then lose one. I'll actually make that sacrifice. We shared a really tight embrace. Now, I can't mention ren. >_> not even to Nada. They both don't want him in their lives. If thats the thing. Then Okay I won't talk about him then. I rarely do actually. Since it pisses everyone off every time his name is being mentioned. Poor guy. I don't really get why people just hate him so freaking much. Oh well.

My eyes are swollen and I hate it. >_> Mom didn't notice. THANK GOD.
I have something else on my mind. I just hope that won't happen. It'll be such a fucking drag.

Yesterday at Nasreens apartment was fucking hilarious. We were so bored we started watching porn. Then we got bored of that cause all we saw were naked women. The hell. >< where are all the guys? HAHAHAHAHAHA. Then we looked for Yaoi. We didn't find any. T-T

Nasreen broke the shower faucet thing and the water started shooting out everywhere, uncontrollably. She got seriously wet. Then I tried blocking the water. >_> Wet. We were all wet. ><>< we couldn't find it. Uncle Noy came and fixed it.

I'm scared

Now, I'm scared.
I might lose the Yans, and my other friends too.
I can't handle that.
They'll all hate me if nikki says stuff about me. I didn't do anything wrong. She just... okay. If she doesn't want to ever have me as a friend. I'm not okay with that. But what can I do? I can't talk her out of it. Shes stubborn. I don't think she'll listen even.

I've been crying on and off the whole night.

The band will go on without me. I think I got myself kicked out.
I don't think I can go out anymore either. Wait I can. I'll go with Nasreen.

I feel so fucking weak. I hate crying. Its completely stupid cause nikki and nada don't care at all.

2 gone.

I'm crying in front of her and she doesn't care at all. Nada even.

I'm not going to be talking to either of them for awhile.
I think its the same for renz.

Gah I cant stay in here. I'm sobbing too much.

Shes laughing with nada right now. while I'm here sobbing slightly. cause of my little 'trying to stop crying' thing awhile ago.

I'm just going to be the silent person again.

I'm completely helpless.
I need someone to talk to. But I'm too scared to talk. I might break down completely, this time.

entity

I just feel like randomly use random words as my titles.

en·ti·ty /ˈɛntɪti/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[en-ti-tee]

–noun, plural -ties.

something that has a real existence; thing: corporeal entities.

italics are fun! woohoo.
Okay, We spent almost the whole day yesterday outside. Mauree came over we went to Hol n One for shits. An hour later we got picked up to go to 2 basketball games at muharraq club then to a victory party. Which led to us going to the 7:30 St.Lucia Game. It was fun I guess. Yeo is so freaking hot. *drool* Nada and boo have a pic with him. Oh well.
Lets see here. I'm not so depressed anymore. I guess I'm getting over him step by step faster than I expected. O-O I find it easier that hes my best friend. Its really messed up. I should be having a hard time. But I'm not. Damn. Wohoo for me. A month should do it. o-o or two weeks. >->

I don't really have this entry planned out like I usually do.
I'm just going with the flow this time.
I'm going to start painting soon-ish.