waiting...

here I am waiting patiently for my magazine. which is Arena37C november 2007, with Alice nine on the cover. While listening to Rasen - lynch. It's 2:25pm. It should be here by now. I'm watching the clock thick. I want that magazine desperately. Why? I dunno. I just want it, cause I paid to much for it. I've never spent 20 dinars on anything at once. and I felt bad when I paid for it online. :(
I seriously want it. :( I don't know what I would do if it wasn't here yet. It has been 9 days already. Yes, I'm counting the days. I'm afraid my parents wont ever let me buy anything online if I never get it. :(

2:30pm

Still waiting... patiently. while listening to the same song on repeat.
waiting for the doorbell, or even an envelope being slipped under my front door or something.
I looked out the window. Nothing yet.
I finished 11th grade. not fairly, but I did. I only copied the areas I didn't know. :(
I promised myself. I wouldn't do it again. I felt bad when I cheated. I wanted to cry everytime my pencil hit the paper while I was copying. I didn't like it. I didn't like feeling stupid. But I did it cause I HATE ALGEBRA AND CHEMISTRY!!! GOD! I hate my life.
I feel bad that my second mother has cancer and I can't do anything about it. :( and I want to see her but I can't cause we're not in the Philippines. I want to be there for her.

2:35pm

Nothing still.
I keep hearing piano playing around but nothings playing. no ones touching the neglected keys. no one. I hear a car pass by the house. it was nothing.
My hearts racing. I No longer can wait. I am impatient. and the magazine is not going to arrive today. :( we'll see if tomorrow will be the day it comes.

15 favs and 21 comments on a deviation I submitted 2hours and 25 minutes ago. I got 6 favs in the first 4 minutes. I was pretty happy when It happened.

2:40pm

It really isn't coming today. :'( I thought I will make my day. it didn't. :( next time Im buying magazines from yesasia.com. I have to record the latest PACES mom corrected. Should I close this blog here?

I should.

-Naj