......

mood: not happy
listening to: yami ni chiru sakura - alice nine.

I seriously hate myself. I can't believe I let myself fall like that. I'm soo naive. This is just too much for me. I'm anxious all the time.. now. Dammit. Stay the fuck away from me. We're friends... ONLY friends... nothing more... he doesn't want anything more... It's one sided again... I don't care anymore. Hurt me... I actually like the pain this 4th time. I'll see them hover around him and I'll smile.. always smile... It hurts... but they don't know that. They don't know anything.


It'll always be one-sided for me... I'm just lucky I didn't hope. I knew this would happen from the beginning.
From the first moment. I laid eyes on him.