Tuesday, September 9, 2008

eat you alive.

I woke up scared. Terrified.
I didn't have a nightmare. I just woke up scared.
I think this happens when I sleep depressed or when my heads not settled. Its like I'm scared to wake up. Subconsciously I'm scared to wake up and meet the next thing that comes to me. The next thing that'll shatter me again. Brake my few days of happiness. I feel 13 again. The age when I wasn't allowed to smile. It hurts to find out that someone so very close to you back stabs you, hates you secretly.

Now, I'm wondering what did I do wrong? What did I do to deserve this? Why'd she do it? Does she really hate me?

After all this I don't think I can trust anyone anymore. Not my sisters, not my cousins, not even my best friends. No one but myself.

I just feel so hated right now.
So fucking hated.

I can't stand much more. If I find out my own best friend is back stabbing me or Nasreen doing it too. I'll fucking kill myself. You just have no idea how much it hurts.

That ventor is really starting to piss me off big time.
Immature & Childish.
Venting out on how much you hate ren on me "his BEST FRIEND". Is stupid. I mean who in the right world would do that unless I hate him too. Guess what I dont. Gez. If you hate the person shouldn't you NOT be talking about him so much. seriously. If he wasn't in every one of our conversations we would have nothing to talk about.

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