listening to: air
Dad is in a bad mood and its scary to be around him at the moment. He just came in and told me to search for colleges online. Then he walked away swearing in arabic. I don't like this.
I don't know what to do. I want mom to ask the school I'm already if they know any hs colleges. They should know. I asked her to do it and all she did was laugh. This is not good at all. Theres a slight chance if I don't find anything I might end up going to AMA and I don't want to.
I know I'm old enough to do shit. But still. Okay. I don't want to waste my parents money again by forcing false hopes towards myself and them. I hate myself for being this way. I just want to freaking jump off this stupid house already... To end both my parents disappointed in me as well as my own hopelessness.
I've noticed now a days people don't seem to be listening to me much. I'm saying something and all I get is silence. I try a couple of more times and its still the same thing. What the fuck is going on? Gah... maybe everyone just has something on their mind every fucking day.
This problem between them will hopefully be fixed. I know it would. If only she would just get over the fact that people can change and they will change. She just needs to accept it and suck it up. I'm sorry to say this but she is being such a spoiled brat. I still don't get why shes so fucking mad at him. I don't see it at all. So what... he grew an ego. Big fucking deal. Hey... at least he didn't go and change so freaking much he never wants to acknowledge your presence. There are worst things and he didn't steal me from you. I am no ones property dammit. This is fucked up.
Stop being stubborn. I know I'm supposed to understand her more but I still don't get it. She doesn't have any hidden agendas, that I know. Just... gah. Get it fixed already. I'm sick of you being all sour faced every time I mention his name.
I'm really glad you don't read my blog.